Genuine Curiosity

Author Dwayne Melancon is always on the lookout for new things to learn. An ecclectic collection of postings on personal productivity, travel, good books, gadgets, leadership & management, and many other things.

 

Daily Report, Jan 13

Last night, I spent some time helping my daughter with her math homework (5th grade stuff). I checked her problems, and she kept getting the answers wrong on four specific multiplication problems. I'd mark them wrong and she'd go into the other room and try again. It was getting frustrating for both of us, so I decided to watch what she was doing.

After only a couple of minutes, I recognized what she was doing - her incorrect answers were rooted a few specific issues:

  • she was getting distracted during the equations and sometimes skipped a step or two;
  • she was writing her "carry" digits in a way that made it difficult to tell where they belonged;
  • she was jumbling some of her numbers together which made it difficult to tell which ones were carry digits and which ones were part of the original equation;
  • she was writing commas throughout the equations to separate the thousands places, and sometimes ended up adding the commas in as 1's when she solved the problem.

To me, as a detached observer, the reasons for the wrong answers were obvious. To her, it was vexing and not getting any better.

I was able to work with her on some changes to how she was writing down the problems, and get her to a place with fewer distractions. I then worked through the first problem with her. After that one came out right, she did the other three on her own pretty quickly.

Coaches can sometimes see what we can't

This morning, it dawned on me that I was acting as a coach in this situation. An incidental coach, perhaps, but still a coach. I was able to watch her "workflow" to determine why she was getting the wrong results, and I could see things in a way that was difficult for her. I was also able to contribute further advice and solutions based on my own experience.

She had the skills necessary to get the work done, but some of her current practices were preventing her from achieving the desired results. And it took someone else's perspective to get her to work in a more productive way.

Therein lies the value of coaching.

In math and life, technique and focus make a difference

The other thing I realized was that the issues confronting her in doing her math problems had a lot in common with the things that keep me from being productive:

  • when I get distracted from the tasks I should be focusing on, I tend to skip a step or two;
  • when I work in a disorganized way, it's hard to figure out where to start or when I'm done;
  • when I'm too close to the work, it's hard to figure out what I'm doing wrong.

Most notably, I've certainly found myself in situations where I tried and tried but didn't get the results I intended or expected.

And, I realized I've gotten a lot from coaches (both professional and incidental) over the years.

Getting lousy results? Feeling frustrated and don't know what you're doing wrong? Or, at a loss for how to fix the problems that are vexing you?

Maybe you need a coach, or a trusted advisor who can give you some outside perspective.


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A cornucopia of networking advice

Josh Hinds has honored me by asking me to participate in an interview on his site, "Business Networking Advice". I'm the December 13th entry in a long series of 3-question interviews on the topic of business networking.

You can find the interview here.

And be sure to take a look around the site - Josh is keeping it real over there, and I learned a lot of cool things from his interviews.

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2006 Talking Story Countdown!

A couple of weeks ago, I wrote some pointers for how to prepare for negotiations. In response to that, Rosa asked a question about what to do after the deal is done.

Here are my thoughts and pointers:

  • Get it down in writing
    • Very soon after the agreement is struck (same day if possible), record what was agreed in writing. I use email because it's efficient and works for my style.
    • This written plan should include the main points of the agreement, committed action items with owners, and any time frames as agreed.
  • Raise the flag on any "gotchas"
    • When writing up the results of the negotiation, you may uncover "holes" that you forgot to address. Bring them up right away.
    • After the work you've done during the negotiation, you probably have a good idea what's going to work for both parties, so feel free to offer some suggestions for how to fill the holes.
  • Follow up and follow through
    • You or a designee on your side should "own" management to the agreement. This includes nagging people who aren't hitting commitments, double-checking the results to ensure that they meet what was agreed, etc.
    • Set a good example yourself by following through and keeping your own commitments. If you don't do this, what leverage do you have if the other person misses a commitment?
  • Don't be too dogmatic
    • Often, we commit based on good faith and what we know at the time of the negotiation. When we actually get down to delivering, we find that what we thought was appropriate doesn't make sense in the real world. Whenever possible, try to manage to the spirit of the agreement - not the letter of the law. This doesn't mean you can change the agreement at will, but you should be open to discussing alternatives that become apparent or necessary during implementation.
  • Don't rule out going back to the bargaining table.
    • Sometimes, one party or the other finds they can't deliver what they thought they could deliver. If you feel that coming, raise the issue early and try to create a collaborative environment to come up with a workable solution.
    • However, don't give up to soon - just because renegotiation may be an option, that doesn't mean it should be used as an "easy out."

These are the things that came to mind for me. What about you? Got any tips to share with us?


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Gene's empty inbox epiphany

A few weeks ago, I shared my GTD Odyssey in an effort to share some of the things I've learned whilst I've tried to tackle Getting Things Done. Based on some of the public and private responses I've received, it seems that I've struck a nerve (in a good way) with some of the things I've shared.

Today, I'd like to share a guest post from a friend of mine, Gene Kim, regarding his "epiphany" following that series, along with some live prodding/coaching from me. Gene and I work together and share an office, so we get to compare notes on GTD on the rare occasions when we are both in the office at the same time. By the way, it was Gene that first told me about Getting Things Done about 4 years ago.

Anyway, here is Gene's story:

I read Dwayne's article about having sustained a state of an empty inbox for weeks with some disbelief and awe, as well as some small bit of inspiration. Why? Having worked with Dwayne for over six years, I have some long buried memories of getting together once every couple of weeks, trying to figure out how to get David Allen's GTD to actually work for us.

A history of trying in earnest

How serious have I been trying to achieve the state that Dwayne mentioned? I actually have screenshots of the 11 times I've actually achieved the nirvana of an actually empty inbox in the past six years that I've been trying.

Incidentally, those rare dates were:

  • 2003
    • Jan 4
  • 2004
    • Jun 6
    • Oct 1, 5, 18, 20
    • Nov 14
  • 2005
    • Jan 12
    • Jun 17
  • 2006
    • Oct 31
    • Nov 1

The epiphany begins

But two weeks ago, after reading Dwayne's article, watching him work, and then getting five minutes of having him watch me work, I finally have an empty inbox. And I have one again today. Two days in a row was a first for me. And, maybe more importantly, I've been able to get my inbox to empty every day for the last two weeks. (This morning is my one exception, due to being sick. But, I know with complete confidence that I'll be there by noon today.)

What makes is remarkable is that I've tried before, but have always quickly fallen off the wagon, and it's been over 17 months since I've had an empty inbox.

Is it that I haven't gotten help before? No. I've tried David Allen seminars, many of David Allen's telecoaching sessions, countless attempts to find software programs to help track TODOs, etc.

What's different?

But, here's what's different: I'm confident that I can keep my inbox empty and stay focused on the things I need to do. I don't have any anxiety of piling things into my TODO folder, feeling like I'm just burying the tasks where I can't see them, and therefore am "cheating" to get my inbox to empty.

Instead, I've found that using the "start bugging me" dates and the clear daily tasks view helps me two things:

  • Quickly generate a small list of tasks that I can stay focused on and confidently and quickly complete
  • Easily defer and snooze tasks to the future, knowing that they will come back, but until then, stay completely invisible

I'm a little surprised at how easy and elegant these key principles of the TWC practice are. But, let me tell you, I suspect that months from now, I'll not only have an empty inbox, but I'll be able to look back to yesterday and see a clear before and after of how I did work.

It can be done, and it's far less work than I ever thought it would be. Are there some other things I'm doing differently? A couple. For me, the most difficult part of "getting to empty" is when I'm down to a handful of messages, and I can't figure out how to get them "unstuck." I've found that in most cases, it's because I need help pulling together the next step, or that I don't have all the information. The remedy is often to pull together a 15 minute meeting to make the decision, or to ask someone else to pull all the relevant information together.

And lastly, let me proudly show off my empty inbox.

Thanks for sharing, Gene. It's been a fun journey.

What's inside your stone?

I spent some time in Calgary and Pittsburgh this week, which afforded me some good plane time to chew through a new book I just received. Short review: Wow - you should check this one out!

The book is "Seeing David In The Stone," by James B. Swartz and Joseph E. Swartz, and it is about how we can learn to be more effective at unlocking our opportunities and shaping our futures by studying the methods of some of the great geniuses of the past.

I think this is a great companion to Dick Richards' "Is Your Genius At Work?" which I reviewed about a year ago. Dick's book is about how to identify your personal, unique strengths, and this book provides some tremendous techniques to help you apply your genius in different ways to maximize the impact of that genius.

The book's an easy, enjoyable read and is presented as a sort of conversation between a learner and his mentor. It's a captivating story, laced with specific case studies of people like Einstein, Marie Curie, Michelangelo, Edison, Da Vinci, and a 65 other masters of their craft. A lot of the stories are from long-ago history, but you'll be pleased to find some spotlights of recent breakthrough successes, as well.

What's so special about this book?

I occasionally allude to some of the IT process consulting work I'm involved in as part of my 'day job,' but it's been more than just consulting. I've been privileged to be part of a groundbreaking research effort to observe and catalog the best known methods of high-performing IT organizations around the world. This research has led to some revolutionary, prescriptive guidance that enables any IT organization to benefit from the things the high performers have Darwinistically evolved on their own (shorten the learning curve, if you will).

"Seeing David In The Stone" has a similar feel to this IT research, since it catalogs and analyzes the practices of some of the most influential people in history. The book then provides a clear, ordered, 12-step process to help you tap into the best known methods of these highly successful leaders.

The practices are context- and industry-independent, and are well explained in the book. I read the book over the course of two flights this week, and found myself getting energized and excited about applying the principles in the book. Some of the concepts "clicked" so hard for me that I could literally feel the connection in my head.

I highly recommend this book for anyone who's involved in a creative pursuit, or who has the spirit of a learner, entrepreneur, or inventor.

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